The Chronicles Of Tree Hill
by Nikki14u
Summary: Can we get back to the fact that you slept with my boyfriend” Tree Hill does have some drama they also have some serious snarking material going on... One Shots filled with Humor
1. The Scotts

**Summary: Just a few funny one shots I put together for OTH. What I have done is taken a few scenes from the show and put together a little side story of my own and here you have it. I hope you enjoy them.**

**Chapter One Description and Setting: This takes place during season one where Nathan gets arrested for the party that was thrown at his apartment. Later in that episode Dan stops by the café after sleeping with Deb the night before. However the rest of the episode goes a little differently in my story…**

**The Chronicles Of Tree Hill**

Dan enters the café and approaches Deb as Karen stands off to the side. The woman in question studies the couple before her and something about their behavior just doesn't seem right. She shifts uncomfortable and inches closer to try and listen in on what's being said. Unable to take it any longer she decides to bite the bullet and question them.

"Okay there's something going on here and I know it"

Deb putting on an innocent face "What are you talking about?

Dan smiles at Karen, knowing that she knows exactly what's going on.

The dark haired woman continues completely ignoring the look Dan's throwing her "You've got that look"

Before anyone could respond Lucas, Nathan and Keith walk in. 

"Hey guys what's up?" questions Lucas innocently.

"What look?" questions Deb not bothering to address the new comers.

However, Karen was not about to let the blond off the hook that easily. She was going to get to the bottom of this no matter who was present. Maybe it was all those novels she read. All of a sudden she thinks she's a freaking detective who's capable of solving mysteries on a simple hunch. I mean really, who the hell could possibly solve a murder just because they read a few books. Shit like that just doesn't happen.

Oh wait it is only season one where the story lines and plots actually do make sense however I get the strangest feeling that maybe just maybe that will all change by season three. Oh well, let's just continue shall we?

Karen "That I just had sex with Dan Scott look you damn trader"

To which her all knowing son with a hero slash Sherlock Holmes complex replies "I think you're wrong Mom. She doesn't look like she's about to puke"

Nathan: Yeah and I don't hear her talking about committing suicide.

Dan turns to them with a hurt expression "Hey, I'm still in the room ya know!

Keith: And that's what makes it so funny.

Dan glares at Keith before slapping him in the back of his head "Bite me!"

Karen turns to him sharply, sucks her teeth and rolls her eyes "Dan come on you know I can't do that with other people in the room"

Lucas is stunned and a little sickened "What?! Don't tell me you've been sleeping with him again!"

Karen turns to face the blonde wearing a guilty expression "Just a little bit. Ok, at least twice a week"

Nathan "Oh the humanity"

Keith shakes his head in astonishment "Karen how can you betray me!"

Dan rolls his eyes "Damn it Keith it's only season one you two don't get together until season three, right before I kill you"

"Oh, ok. My bad"

Keith takes some time to think about it.

"Wait a minute! You're going to kill me"

Dan realizing his mistake and tries to cover up his super evil master plan not wanting it to be ruined before he's had the chance to carry it out "I didn't say that"

Unfortunately both his sons rat him out "YES YOU DID"

"You're both grounded now shut up"

Lucas folds his arms across his chest before turning to Nathan "I knew we shouldn't have said anything"

"Can we get back to the fact that you (She says pointing at Deb) slept with my boyfriend" Karen says with her hands on her hips giving Deb a dirty look.

"Hey, he's my husband" 

"That's so not the point and if you want to get technical about it he was mine first"

Lucas stands and applauds "Word up ma!"

"Shut up Lucas" Nathan says giving him a small shove.

"Both of you shut up! (Dan says pulling up a chair as Keith does the same) I want to see how this turns out"

"Ditto" Keith says sitting next to his brother leaning in close to the woman, hoping that there will be some shredded clothing by the end of the fight.

Deb comes from around the counter and glares at Karen: "Key word being _was _yours now he's mine"

"No, he's mine"

Deb smiles and puts her hands on her hips "Well he was mine last night"

Karen takes a deep breathe, throws a dish rag at Dan then turns back to Deb with a smirk "Well I guess you didn't do the job right because he was mine this morning!"

"BITCH!" screamed Deb as she lunged at Karen knocking her to the ground. However Karen was quick to gain the upper hand pinning the woman to the ground and slapping her repeatedly. 

Dan: THIS IS GREAT!

Keith: "Yeah. Nice round house Kar!"

Nathan: "Hey something's missing. Go mom!"

"Kick her $$ Mom! (He yells turning to Nathan) Oh yeah I know what it is"

Lucas rushes over to the stereo and turns on "Girl Fight by Brooke Valentine"

Nathan: Now it's complete!

LOL… Okay guys next up will be some Naley followed by Lucas, Peyton, and Brooke.

Hope you enjoyed this and please be sure to REVIEW!!!


	2. Nathan, Haley, Lucas

**Chapter Two Description and Setting:** This chapter takes place during season two when Nathan buys Haley a Keyboard instead of buying them a car. This is my spin on that scene…

**The Chronicles of Tree Hill**

A frustrated Haley is pacing back and fourth in front of her not so welcomed gift. As much as she wants to keep it she knows that having a car is more important at the moment and now she has to make her husband see things her way without making him feel like the moron that he is, a pretty moron but a moron none the less.

"Look Nathan I know that you were just trying to do something nice for me but we have to be smart about our money situation and things are very tight right now"

The dark haired boy crossed his arms across his chest, leaned back and smirked.

"Actually I think you're just being a tight ass as usual and I can't wait until you go off on your tour"

"What tour?"

"You know the one that the writers just happened to pull out of their asses to piss off the Naley fans. This way I get to spend all of my time with Lucas. Personally I think that they're just leading up to our incest story line for season five"

_Oh come on people anything is possible in Tree Hill_

Haley looks at Nathan like he has three heads. Where the hell was he coming up with this crap?

"Nathan have you been drinking again? That is the lamest idea that I have ever heard of in my life"

"Listen sweetheart it's your story line not mine"

"Oh really and taking money from an absolute stranger who just happens to be involved in organized crime which leads to your ridiculous points shaving story line is just so much better, right? How about this sweet cheeks, the next time we need money why don't you try getting off of your lazy manwhoreing ass and getting a job?"

"Please I'm too damn sexy to work Haley. All I need to do is play basketball and whine about my Dad and how I'm nothing like him. Besides real jobs are for losers. I'd much rather just stand still and look pretty" 

At that moment Lucas walks in just as a timer goes off.

"What the hell was that?"

"Oh that's just the timer sounding. It means that it's time for me to take my shirt off. It's just one of the hazards of being the prettiest person on the show. Does this angle make my ass look fat?"

"Nah you look great Nate. Oh and by the way, the way that the top of your jeans hugs that small space right above your hips is extremely sexy" Lucas says with a wink before turning to his best friend "What's up Hales?"

"You're brother's being a dumb ass that's what's up" she then pauses for a second, scrunches up her face and turns back to her best friend "Did you just make a pass at Nathan? Oh my God, you two are so gross"

"I know you are but what am I?"

"Shut up twinkle toes"

"Hey! My brother may be a little bit on the gay side but that's none of your business. Besides you better be nice to him other wise we won't be able to sucker him into being the kid's God Father and raising him for us. This in turn means that we won't be able to play basketball or go on contrived tours"

"Oh, sorry"

Haley takes a minute to think about what was just said.

"What?! Wait one God damn minute. What kid?"

"The one I'm going to knock you up with at the end of next season. I mean you can't be shocked Hales. The Scotts are know for their awesomely wonderful super sperm"

"That's impossible. I mean I'm freaking Haley James. You know tutor girl, the only person in Tree Hill with a brain"

Nathan and Lucas share a look before busting out laughing and pointing in Haley's direction.

"Are you serious Haley? You haven't been smart since mid season one" laughs Nathan as he doubles over in hysterics and leaning on Lucas for support.

However Haley wonders why support from Lucas involves squeezing the boy's inner thigh.

"No, no, that's not true. It can't be"

"I'm afraid it is"

"But why? I mean what have I done to make them completely destroy my character and everything that I stood for?"

"Give me a break Hales! You know Mark hates you and enjoys destroying your character. Oh by the way I wouldn't stand in the middle of the street having a conversation any time soon if I were you"

Evil Mark pops in for a second does his famous brand of evil laughter and disappears again.

"But that's not true. Mark said that he likes me. That he really, really likes me"

"Aw. Some people just don't know show biz talk when they hear it" Lucas replies as Nathan sits on his lap.

Haley takes a breath as her eyes focus on the brothers.

"What the hell are two you doing?"

"Getting ready for season five"

"I think I'm going to be sick"

"Yeah you and the rest of the One Tree Hill fans" says Nathan as he gives Lucas a kiss.

As Haley's throwing up Brooke enters the room and takes a look at the scene before her.

"I have got to find a better job. I am way too awesome for this shit"

**Ok guys I know I was a little rough on Nathan and Haley but it's all in good fun. Next up will be Brooke, Lucas and Peyton. **


End file.
